Sunday, August 02, 2026
Keep Rebuilding
I am not afraid of isolation, failure or shame; because I have already lived there and survived it. I have become stronger not because I have never broken down or fallen to the bottom. In fact quite the opposite.
I quietly healed, completely alone- with no rage, no chaos, no violence. Life took me apart, drove me to a corner and reduced me to my lowest terms. Broke with no direction. I decided to rebuild myself when God opened the door in 2020, brick-by-brick with nobody coming to save me except the Lord.
I don’t need anyone to believe in me, believe in my dreams. I don’t need anyone to validate my pain nor applause my progress. I thank God for this kind of refining as it can’t be taught in a class or read from books, but only forged in isolation, brokenness, when nobody understands the pain and nor see my hidden tears.
I will keep rebuilding, stop chasing, stop explaining myself to people who already decided not to understand or believe where I am going. I may not be the ready-made thing you are looking for as God is still molding and building me. I have learnt to stop searching for completion in another person, as it is only found within myself. I don’t need anyone’s approval as God has already approved of me. Instead I will guard my peace and rebuild.
When man says it is over that is when God takes over. Life stripped me down to nothing, then I looked at the truth about myself, sucked out the marrow of life, and knew that is a journey I had to go through. I was thrown to the very bottom so hard that I couldn’t recognize myself down there, till the Lord gave me the strength to claw my way up.
When life fell apart and every single person quietly disappeared while I was facing multiple legal actions in court for debts, I learnt that that the only person I couldn’t abandon was myself. Even in the pit I knew God will never abandon me. I may be in the pit but my mind was on the palace. Going forward, I now carry a clarity, a considered view of future goals which cannot be faked, cannot be taught. I will live deliberately, God-reliant, grounded in way no one needs to understand.
